I Might Have Created A Monster...

...and NO, it's not my child {or husband}.

Disclaimer - For you "picture people" that don't ever read blogs, you just looks at pictures, this one is NOT for you. I'm just typing what's going through my mind...a "Pictureless Post" if you will.

For the first time in a REALLY long time {and possibly ever}, I can say that I truly have a hobby that I am PASSIONATE about. I love sewing, appliqueing, crafting in general. Anything that I can make with my hands FEEDS my need to have tangible results of my time & efforts. I just LOVE {and NEED} to see the fruits of my labor. Always have.

This is probably the thing that I DON'T like most about my job. I feel like I pour hours of analysis and analytical mind power into something that ends up in some bottomless audit black hole. That drives me crazy. Yeah, okay, here's a pretty FINAL memo or report. Yes, I'm glad it's done, but it is NOT THE SAME THING.

I LOVE knowing that Carson or another kid is walking around in something I made. I LOVE walking into the kitchen and seeing the valance and table runner I made. I LOVE walking into our room and seeing the headboard I made. I just love seeing something created from nothing.

This past weekend, when I got a babysitter to come over for a few hours just so I could go into my sewing hideout, I probably gave myself the best gift I could have. I was in the zone. I was on fire. I was LOVING what I was doing. I didn't want it to stop. Of course, I didn't want to neglect my baby, but I haven't given myself that kind of time to do something that I wanted to do in a REALLY long time.

I think I might have an obsession now. I can't stop looking at Pinterest for ideas. I feel like I have pinned a million things and have a million ideas swirling in my head and then I panic {well, that's probably not the right word} that I won't ever be able to find the time to do any of these things. Sewing requires more than 30 minutes at a time. This is when working at home SUCKS. I feel like there is a voice from the garage whispering to me, "Just come out here for little while. You'll feel better..." It would be SO easy to just run out there, but I have SO much work to do. So what am I doing, blogging about it. I might as well just be out there. There's just so much on my mind. I am just ITCHING to make things. I think the years of being hobby-less are catching up to me now. I have so much bottled up creative energy just dying to get out! I think I'm going to tell Andrew to take Carson to Baytown for the weekend sometime and leave me here. After all, he did just go hunting for a week, he owes me, right?!?!? :-)

At the least, when I know I won't be as busy with work, I think I'll just take a couple days off here and there to just have "ME" days. Days to sew, days to organize, days to just do whatever I want to do. Days to get that creative, nagging energy out. It truly does NAG at me. I can honestly say that my mind is SO not in work mode... all I want to do is run out to my shop. I DON'T get tired of it. I might get frustrated. Yes, there is always plenty of that, but I never get tired of it. As excited as I am to be so energized about something, I'm also a little concerned... it almost bothers me more because I don't have the time to work on everything I want to. Then I get depressed {okay, that's a little bit of an exaggeration} because I can't get the energy out. It makes work and the day-to-day stuff worse because all I think about is how much WANT to go sew and that I'm NOT getting to. Someday, be able to wake up early and go out there before work, but this time of year is certainly not that time. I LOVE being in bed when it's cold outside.

One of my best friends {real best friend, not just bloggy best friend} over at Hop Across the Pond, suggested we have a crafting weekend. Um... AWESOME IDEA!!! Unfortunately, it didn't work out this past fall and she's expecting her first little this spring, so timing may be tough, but SOMEDAY we WILL do this. If anyone else would like to partake, let me know and we will SERIOUSLY try to get this on the calendar. {How funny is it that a "Girls Weekend", even 5 years ago, likely had a totally different agenda! Ah, times, they are a-changin'!!!