The first week with our precious Carson came with mixed emotions. We also had to say goodbye to Andrew's grandfather, J.R. Peters, or better known to us as "Papa." Papa's health over the last couple of years had been a roller coaster. He'd been in and out of the hospital a number of times. There had even been a couple of times when we thought we wasn't going to make it, but he always managed to fight through it against the odds.
He was probably more excited than anyone about Carson. He wanted a great-grandchild so badly. As I mentioned above, there were a couple of times where he was on his deathbed and managed to recover. We know he wasn't ready yet. He wanted to still be on this earth when his great-grandchild was born. In the weeks leading up to Carson's birth, he took a turn for the worse. This time, he wouldn't recover; however, he managed to hang on until after Carson was born. He never got to meet Carson in person, but he did get to see pictures. It breaks my heart that he wasn't able to see him in person, sit in his chair and hold him, share his stories, etc., but I know he pushed his body to hang on as long as he did, and for that, we are all so grateful.
We know that with each birth also comes a death, and that circle of life was as evident as ever that week. As grief stricken as we all were at Papa's passing, we were also able to celebrate a new life. I think God planned it that way for us. I remember Andrew telling me after Grandma Connie passed away how crushed he would be when that same day came for Papa. Papa was the one who taught him how to hunt and fish and began that love for the outdoors that Andrew lives for. Andrew and Papa were very close; he was his only grandson. I think that they joy we were feeling at Carson's birth really helped everyone cope with the loss of Papa.
Andrew really wanted to share his perspective of Papa at the funeral, and I know everyone there was really moved by his words. In my opinion, so many funerals, especially of older people, tend to be generic and not very personal. Andrew didn't want that for Papa. Below is the outline of what Andrew shared at the funeral. It isn't verbatim, but will give you a sense of how special a moment it was for Andrew to share his point of view. I realize it's a little long, but it is well worth it.
Today we are here to remember a special man. Many know him as J.R., or John Robert. Some even called him Johnny Bob, and to two people he was known as Dad or Daddy. But today I will call him what I have always called him and that is Papa. Heck, I didn’t even know the man had a real name until I was five years old. Much less I didn’t understand that the J and the R even had names attached to them. And when Johnny Bob was thrown into the mix I didn’t know what to think. But today he is Papa.
Papa was a family man. From the day I can remember he was always family first. He was also practical, that was easily seen every day attire. Making a bold fashion statement, he always wore his comfortable overalls and cool mesh backed baseball cap. He wore these for one reason...practicality.
Papa could be seen cruising around town in his luxurious Ram charger. He likely had a bucket full of crabs in the back or something dead and stinky enough that you didn’t want to ride with him. The name of the truck “RAM” fit it perfectly for him, because he occasionally used it for just that.
As you know, Papa loved to fish and hunt. He spent many days tending to crabs traps and catching crappie and trout. He also had many found memories of fishing and hunting trips with family and friends. And his biggest challenge was to figure out just how to make the smallest of fish fit to eat.
Papa was quick to engage anyone in conversation, even if you didn’t want a conversation. And even if you weren’t being the one involved in this conversation if you were nearby...you would hear it.
Papa’s conversations were undoubtedly always filled with boisterous laughter, a laugh that would echo through the room. One of the special things I remember about these many conversations were that they always led to stories. I am sure everyone knows all these stories because you have heard them 2, 3, 4, or 100 times. But the special things about these stories are they always involved family. Be it a story about a pirogue trip with his son or a camping trip with his family. Or how he paddles across the bayou just to see his girlfriend, who is now his wife. Or even a special word that his grandchildren made up. You know I joke about home many times we have heard all these stories, but in all reality every time he told one I was drawn to listen.
These numerous stories of his life and family are a shining example of the type of family man he was. I look today at his loving wife of nearly 60 years, his two children and three grandchildren and see that these stories of his life weren’t to entertain you, they weren’t told to be boastful or to brag they weren’t to gain attention, but these stories were an outward symbol of his undying love for his family. An undying love he showed to his wife, children and grandchildren until the day he died.
As many of you know I recently became a father just a few days ago. This was the most special moment of my life. And over the last few days as I thought about saying goodbye to Papa I was also thinking about the life ahead of my son Carson. I had so many things going through my head at once. And I kept coming back to the same thing... Papa’s wonderful stories. I thought of the many stories of Papa’s past but also thought of the many stories of my young son’s life yet untold. Then I realized through the many stories of Papa’s past his life allowed me and all of his family to have a framework for the future. A framework built on love and family, happiness and joy. A framework that will allow us to have long wonderful laughter filled stories for many years to come.
So today Papa is laid to rest. Here on Earth he may no longer make a cast in the bay, or pull in a crab trap off the pier or argue if that fish is big enough to eat. But in his wonderful stories and the love his instilled in his family his memory will live on forever.
How do you narrate a life filled with joy?
How do you tell a story with so many memories?
How do you express such a long wonderful life long tale in just a few words?
Only God knows what story or memories each and every one of us has of this special man. And these stories, etched in our memory, will allow us to remember him forever.
I knew I had to end this in a way that Papa would want, as you know we spent many a days in the field chasing deer and catching fish and I only found it fitting that I end this by saying this special prayer I found: It’s called the Fisherman’s Prayer
God grant that I may live to fish
Until my dying day
And when it comes to my last cast
I then most humbly pray
When in the Lord's safe landing net
I'm peacefully asleep
That in his mercy I be judged
As good enough to keep.
Papa always treated me as though I was one of his own grandchildren. He was always genuinely interested in what was going on with me. He loved to chat and share stories. I wasn't able to attend the funeral because Carson was just days old. I wish so badly I could have heard Andrew speak, and that I could have said goodbye with the rest of the family. I almost feel as though I lost a grandparent as well. I have shed many tears, including as I write now. Papa was a great man and will be truly missed. Love you Papa!
